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Monday, August 18, 2008
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5:25 PM
today . i was so fucking tired . but i didnt slp in class la . -.- now i'm damn tired , ltr might be sleeping awhile before i start studying . well , i guess we going to gone bonkers becos every lessons of geo now had alr been replaced by ss ! and thursday i gt 4 periods of ss ! ohhh man !! -.- but for th sake of our n lvl . well well , i dunno . you had realli changed alot , dun say abt ur thinking . but ur attitude changed . I dunno . i just dun dare to look into ur eyes and talked to you . i dunno why am i feeling this way .. am i feeling deep numb inside cos i dun realli care abt how you treat me infact i was looking forward to th day where we were not as cold as now . changing my temper was real hard for me. this few days i had been enduring some of th small things. just like today, perhaps i listened wrongly . but nvm , you sounded like it's my fault . but i told myself to relax and not to argue with you . I didnt argue with you , you know why ?! becos i dun want to make you feel tired and getting hurt again (this is th secondary factor ) primary factor was tt i can change my temper . I dunno what am i doing this too ?! to let you feel better or to let me feel better . I just dun have th urge to tell you anything , i also dunno why . maybe th feeling is fading away as each day pass by . and i found it weird tt . everything had come to this situation it was you who ended it . you th one who started it , th one who ended it . th one who told me tt hope our friendship would nvr end . but now .. haiis . nowadays i dun feel like sititng in class ,esp beside euu . cos euu dun even bother to talk to me unless necessary . in ur eyes , am i that invisible or transparent ?! i had ever wonder .. is our friendship tt strong and tt our trust is unbreakable .. i guess ..it's.. i felt like deep inside our heart , our friendship had faded away alot . and why am i th one maintaining this friendship ? if i wasnt th one holding on ,taking th initiatives to come and look for you , talk to you , sms you , will you ever take th initiatives . i doubt so . and i'm tired .. th fact tt i'm nt going to hold on to this friendship is coming nearer and nearer . thanks pauline : but yeah , i realli felt th sense of having a true friend once before and thanks to her =D |
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